How to Speak English Politely — The Adab Way

Bondowoso – 1miliarsantri.net : In Islam, our Prophet ﷺ said: “The best among you are those with the best manners.” Politeness is more than cultural window dressing; it is a universal sign of one’s character. Because English is widely spoken and often considered the global language, it becomes a powerful medium through which we can project Islamic adab—when used with intention, respect, and humility.

Politeness in English Meets Islamic Adab

To begin with, one might wonder: what does being polite in English look like, and how does that overlap with Islamic etiquette? In everyday communication, English politeness often comes in softeners—phrases like please, thank you, excuse me—that cushion requests or show gratitude. Islamic adab likewise upholds similar virtues: honoring others, expressing gratitude to Allah and human beings, and preserving dignity in speech. By recognizing these parallels, Muslim learners can integrate polite English expressions in ways that are natural, authentic, and rooted in faith.

As we shift from understanding to action, considering specific expressions helps us make the abstract concrete.

Key Expressions and Their Adab Alignment

Let’s explore some typical situations where English politeness intersects with Islamic manners—and see how a subtle change in phrasing can carry deeper meaning.

Greetings

 When saying “Hello, how are you today?”, starting with Assalamu’alaikum adds more than a religious greeting—it sets a tone of mercy and peace before moving into worldly conversation. This small blend honors both culture and character.

Asking Permission

 Instead of barging in or using casual speech, saying “May I come in, please?” reflects both English courtesy and Islamic etiquette (which calls for seeking permission before entering). The word please softens the approach, while the act of asking shows respect.

Expressing Gratitude

 “Thank you very much for your assistance” is kinder when paired with Alhamdulillah, because it reminds that kindness eventually stems from Allah’s blessings, then is returned to the people.

Apologizing

 A phrase like “I’m sorry for the oversight. Please forgive me.” shows ownership of one’s mistake. In Islam, repentance and humility are essential; apologizing in English gives us a chance to reflect those virtues.

Making Requests

 “Could you please share your notes with me?” is more than a request—it beckons kindness. The phrase Could you please… reduces imposition and echoes the gentle style encouraged by prophetic teachings.

Read More: Adab First: Cultivating Character Through Language

Conversations that Reflect Adab

Putting it all together, real dialogue helps connect what we intend with what we say. Here are some short exchanges that show how transitions in language and manners can reinforce our values.

Dialogue 1: Greeting and Connection

A: “Assalamu’alaikum! Hello, how are you today?”

 B: “Wa’alaikumussalam! I’m well, thank you. And you?”

 Here, the speaker bridges spiritual greeting with everyday English—a fusion that embodies identity and respect.

Dialogue 2: Permission and Space

A: (Knocks lightly) “Excuse me, may I enter, please?”

 B: “Certainly—please come in.”

 Knocking, asking, waiting—these small acts preserve dignity and privacy. They are illustrative of modesty and caring for boundaries.

Dialogue 3: Thanks and Response

A: “Thank you so much for your help.”

 B: “Alhamdulillah, I’m happy to assist.”

 This shows how gratitude to Allah and to people can go hand in hand—reinforcing sincerity in both.

How to Practise Adab in Everyday Speech

Moving beyond examples, consistent practice is what turns polite expressions into habits. Here are ways to nurture that:

1. Renew your intention daily. Let every polite phrase you use be an act of worship, aiming to express character not just words.
2. Build thematic vocabulary. Pair words like humility, respect, mercy with their meanings in Islam—this gives you tools to express adab naturally.
3. Join communities that care about manners. Being around people who gently correct and encourage polite speech helps much more than practising alone.
4. Reflect after interactions. Notice: was your tone soft enough? Did you wait to speak, or dominate? Did your words carry kindness? Using a journal or notes helps.

A Fresh Perspective: Beyond Politeness to Presence

While polite phrases are valuable, ultimate adab goes deeper: to the presence you carry. Your tone, your sincerity, your listening are all parts of speaking politely. When you speak English with authenticity, humility, and genuine respect—not just the words—you embody adab in a way that draws people closer, not pushes them away.

Conclusion

English is more than a language—it can be a canvas for adab. When we integrate Islamic manners into every greeting, request, apology, and word of thanks, we elevate what we say into something meaningful. Let us not be satisfied with speaking fluently; let us aim to speak beautifully. May Allah guide our tongues to what pleases Him, and make every utterance a reflection of our character and faith.

“O Allah, beautify our words with adab and use our tongues in what pleases You.”

Witer: Glancy Verona

Editor: Abdullah al-Mustofa

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